Dan T Oct 21 2011 Good Enough is no longer Good Enough

Got to barn--tractor broken so scooped 5 muck buckets of Angel's poop out of back paddock so it would be available to session.

Session: 30 minutes or so of talk to begin then..will sift through that discussion later and maybe post.

In the back paddock: Started with curiosity game--crouched behind Try and tossed dirt at her butt til she turned and came to me to see what was up.

Then as Dan figured Try was dreading one of the "round pen" intensity sessions to change it up he said to get on her back. So went to the fence and mounted.

Well this was TRULY bareback (no bareback pad) and truly bridleless. So all I had was carrot stick, my legs and the ability to hold onto her mane when she felt emotional/scattered.

We started with passenger lesson with the parameters of today's game being that Try would need to figure out that she could choose a different sweet spot than the gait. So I would swat my shoulders with the savvy string etc. This went on forever.

Then we moved on to being particular about point to point, yoyo, turn on haunches and sideways with the purpose being to help Try when intensity makes her emotional to find that she is ok and intensity can be her friend that she can work thru it and everything is good. I had trouble communicating with fewer tools and insecurity of bareback but learned that I could stay with it long enough to be both successful at being particular AND that I could win the game by having Try be relaxed doing it. I am winning when Try is relaxed and I don't feel the need to hold mane.

 At one point Try was confused and "took off" at a canter--and I found that was not a big deal--it was a slow canter and no more than ??30 feet. I was glad to know this is ok. I am strong enough to ride it and had legs and could hold mane.

My quitting too soon is like being codependant with alcoholic. I am not helping Try to get over being emotional and upset about intensity by quitting or avoiding. Also learning that Try as LBI might enjoy being particular.

Then we went into the field be the ring. I have never ridden in this field and was wary because this area was filled land with surprize potholes etc in a lot of the area but knew the far left area was a pretty good area. Also this is currently Try's pasture.

So mounted from the salt block (LOL) using western saddle chosen by me to promote my concentration to help Try with emotional fitness not to improve my riding.

So Dan and I were checking trot and canter for emotional fitness and quality within the tasks of go and whoa. I learned that I need softer cue for whoa than the exhale and that I need to decide what that will be and distinguish it for Try from relaxed riding.

Next Dan had us play with speed within gaits. Try has a western pleasure jog, and medium and fast trot--I knew that but was pleased that she made the transitions fairly relaxed. Next the canter: well I did not know if Try would remember lope as a slow canter but she immediately did and was fairly relaxed with transitions within speed of gait BUT would be emotional when I upped the intensity within the canter. So to help with that the exercise became to be slow on the straight line and increase intensity and speed of canter on the turn. Also Dan suggested using bend at ribcage to engage HQ in western pleasure lope to prevent the trotting behind.

Although physically we didn't do all that much today. Try and I were both really tired at the end. Emotional and mental work.

 Thoughts and discussion—more

My biggest goal/concern for the day was further exploration of Intensity is our Friend and helping Try get over being emotional when things get more intense.

1.     What prevents me from doing this? Why do I choose good enough and quit too soon? I can stick to something book learning, dance, physical fitness, LBI great so why not with Try. Dan says and I agree the reason is my RBE desire to avoid conflict and have Try like me!!!!!!!!!! But this creates the codependence—see above.

2.     A thought: although Try may be a difficult LBI as far as I am concerned the worst thing she ever did was wonderful. She is truly my choice of the best horse for me. I feel so safe with her.

3.     Finding the emotional so we can play with it: if it doesn’t happen from my inner energy its ok to use my extraversion.

4.     Upping phases—I can see that I need to use this but use it well. Catch the moment and be fair and use phase that matters to Try. If too consistent with phases Try will tune it out.

5.     Also with phases need to push buttons to get some emotion from Try to have something to play with.

6.     I asked how to id LBE in Try as I think I only see RBE. Well, if Try goes RBE and then relaxes but still has heightened energy then that can be LBE. Also fine line between LBE that is a little unconfident and RBE that is fairly relaxed.

7.     Good enough is no longer good enough.

8.     Call Neil Pye

9.     GoC—I don’t care about contact with Try’s mouth at this time and maybe never.

Phone call 9/23/2011

Phone call to clear up confusion about intensity: how long, frequency, etc. based on experiences of the last few days.

Monday after Friday’s session with Dan: Lovely turn on haunches from Z5 and push the ball to me. Extreme friendly to wake her up. Did not know how to play with her like Dan did. Circling on the rail/dominance game ok but didn’t see anything exciting in the way of a change in Try. Shaping Try’s body at a trot and canter and bowtie were great.

Wednesday: Emotional day for me and not good. Try immediately walked away from me so game on circling/dominace. Went for a long time with Try stopping in the corners and I had needed to enlarge my circle but didn’t think about it to later. Sideways over caveletti poles with intensity—really cleaned up the sideways and Try was taking responsibility for doing it bridleless BUT was that just obedience rather than partnership?

Thursday: Flies were horrible. She trotted to me to get out of the pasture. Riding did not go well either for the same reason. We did get one sideways each way—which Try clearly did to get it over with. Then got 4 laps of no stirrups out of the way and quit. Back in the barn, Try offered to walk down the hall without me and get into the wash stall and position herself for a shower.

Discussion with Dan:

1.      Balance between gaining respect, building Try’s ability to ask questions versus harming her confidence.

2.      The object isn’t obedience so much as getting Try to say it’s a good idea to be a partner and assume responsibility
3.      Dominant horse would bit kick ignore—range
4.      Try getting sidepass over with—knew what to do and got a release and got away from the flies.
5.      Try giving less each day after getting it: don’t get stuck in a rut. Don’t play with the same level of energy all the time within a session or day to day. Play hard for 15 minutes then something else.
6.      Important is for me to ask myself WHY am I doing it in that moment. Is it to change an attitude or build an attitude of questioning etc. Try wants toknow the PURPOSE for the intensity
7.      If I get LBE energy don’t ignore it—use it i.e. cutting, canter, lead changes
8.      Don’t overuse the LBE energy or she will be discouraged from offering it again.
9.      She will get to like the intensity if its not overdone or pointless.
10.   Goal like ballet class: don’t want the session to be over.
11.   Riding and safety: listen to my voice and ask the question—is this a safety issue or an unrealistic fear? The match the energy so Try can work thru it.
12.   Challenge myself to expand my comfort zone. Good place to start is in the field or the trail start with jog or easy trot.

Intensity is our Friend

2011 9 notes Intensity is our friend.

Try is afraid of intensity and it makes her emotional from a RBI lack of confidence to full scale RBE. If I stop and calm her down when she is emotional I am rewarding it and increasing the chances of reoccurrence rather than decreasing it. My task will be to help Try see that intensity on my part isn’t so bad and help her to be less and less emotional about it.

Round pen

1.      First we did circling from me in zone 5, turn on the haunches—asking for front end to spin without me moving my feet until she gives me her other eye then draw zone1. The latter part Dan said she learned the fastest of any horse he has seen.

2.      Then I played at liberty stick to me a bit including going to the ball and Try pushed it a little and then pushed it to me a bit. It may be ok to occasionally give a treat for this. When I asked Dan said Try did it because I asked to please me but she thought it was stupid and pointless.

3.      Dan suggested I needed to wake Try up a bit so I played really hard myself upping energy and phases and moving a lot and Try gave me maybe 35% instead of 10% energy.

4.      So Dan played with Try a bit to give me images to understand. It took a couple minutes for Dan to get Try with him. He did it with internal energy and intention, a few flicks of the stick when necessary BUT never moved his feet much and when he did he did so slowly.

5.      Then Dan had me send Try out to the rail to circle. Try took it as a dominance game right off! The test for me: intensity, move less, win the game—not allow her to change direction but not rush to do so. By the 3^rd or 4^th time I could stand in the center to change her back to the desired direction and each time she would finally decide to stop and I would draw her with big intensity on my part instead of taking the pressure off with relaxing. The 4^th time she stopped dead on the circle and came right to me—deciding to yield to my leadership was not such a bad deal. Note: don’t pet her immediately after dominance game. Wimpy.

6.      So Dan says horses are looking for good leaders. Try as extreme in dominance not so much but if I can figure this out she will come around. A benefit of this will also be an increase in impulsion.

Saddle shimming and cradle bridle. Hmm. Ride in the western saddle for canter/work on intensity and emotion to allow space for my thoughts. Cradle bridle ok for one hand riding. Try doesn’t mind it and it gives her more tongue release. Casual rein for freestyle.

In the ring

1.      Trot and shape Try’s body on the circle using dip shoulder and eyes phase 1, inside leg phase 2, taptaptap with stick at the leg phase 3. This can be a way to keep Try straight in point to point to use in conjunction with pushing with the other leg to avoid overusing and nagging with that cue.

2.      Then take circle into a canter, shaping on the circle

3.      Circle large and then small staying on the same lead

4.      Circle and go off on a straight away (not stopping if she gets emotional) then shape the other side for a lead change.

5.      Also use with bowtie and cloverleaf

6.      Flying change: Pat uses move the hind end, Linda front end shaping—Dan says both can work and experiement.

7.      Try needs me to have her be emotional and keep going and work through it so she can learn to relax with the intensity.

8.      Dan compared Try to Casper in terms of difficulty from dominance stand point not looking for leader. Try also has the added component studied today of getting emotional when the intensity increases.

Dan T call August 2011

My notes on the call

1. resistance/controlling behaviors whether sneaky introverted or extraverted and obvious.  Figure 8 and catch me.

 Problem getting stuck in the corners. Dan says when Try stops, if it is dominance i.e. making me move first so she wins. then when she stops I could be direct line and go in and say no by God you'll go--but creates more bad attitude. Try deal with it and get over it.

OR if she stops, I can just stand there like a statue, life up not moving open door for her to move forward and just wait. (martial arts masters--stood for 30 min not moving and contest declared a draw) Whoever moves first loses. Doing nothing is the most powerful thing you can do. Be prepared to wait it out as Try can be very persistent! Signs of a change: blow, lick, sigh, shake, relaxation in the body and the ultimate is that she will decide to move forward. Experiment and see if she can turn loose and relax and how she does it.

2. Dan says if I can be consistent real changes will be made--I need to believe this--she will learn to see this as a win-win.

All horses share a basic belief system or instinct that they are always looking for who is the best leader. The best leader can best fill needs of safety, comfort, play and food. Horses will follow the best leader in the herd even if nasty and mean. I shared Try remaining independent of the her with a nasty leader and really enjoying a benevolent leader. Casper remaining independent for example. Try has enough sense of self security so as not to be needy and unconfident and able to be independent.

Starting Parelli 7 games can change position in the herd:

1. Horses in the bottom of the pecking order move up because they gain confidence

2. Dominant horses move down because they gain confidence--desire to dominate based partly on fear rather than confidence.

Anyway I said that I feel I am fixing stuff and not moving ahead but that it feels right to do so. Dan says I am playing with foundation stuff i.e. my goal is playing L1/2 from a L4 quality rather than playing L4 with an L2 quality.

 This requires identifying and changing habits and history over a span of 7 years. Dan says the positive part of the 7 years is that I have a lot of relationship with her. The negative is that habits have been formed that aren't all positive i.e. habits that allow her to win and that they are unconscious.

Dan says he appreciated me staying with the catch me session last time until there was a huge shift Long going through it physically and a challenge to core beliefs and the feel of a positive new form of leadership. My challenge to myself is--now am I really doing enough or have I wimped out some?

August: Channeling Rhett--nurturing RBI, soft gentle energy, zone 1 with Zero tolerance. So I am making a big shift from RBI to power up LBE. Dan: this is good to do--Me: lots to learn here. Soft, sloooow. This is good as Try relates so well to RBI's who are good leaders.

Phone Coaching July - Catch Me Issues

I was having trouble figuring out how to use the catch me game for zero tolerance and progress--Try's commitment to the relationship so scheduled call with Dan. (I may have been too tired during the lesson last week to do anything but follow commands from Dan--no real processing on my part.)

In no particular order:
1. Try's "yes but" 75% truly impedes our progress.
2. round corral--haul her to the mats. Important for Try and for me that I WIN it. 

Process

1. Turn toward gets a 1/4 to 1/2 break. Also when she turns toward I back a bit to release pressure. The restart the process of blocking and change of direction. Try will find the good deal is checking in with me.
2. If she turns toward me and stops. Do nothing. Be neutral--allow Try time to process even if its a few minutes. Then draw with approach. If she is too intimidated fearful, draw with retreat. LB/RB

Intense Session: can you get her to accept something physically. Next day ok to break it up mentally with trail ride etc. Note it is normal that she will be physically trashed because of her mental anguish.

Looking for mental, emotional, physical and rappore.

When Try is snarky, refuses--go to round pen block her.

Try is very good at controlling things. I need to take control. She may be resentful in the short term that she isn't able to control.

Cantering on autopilot--interrupt and block until her spin away becomes spin toward. I can cut the ange, be a little ahead of her so I don't have to work as hard. Block continually until she turns toward. Game back on.

When she turns toward. INSTANTly give her relief by backing away. She will learn turning toward is better than away.

Try will turn loose of the idea she has to control that its not a bad deal for me to be the leader.

Picking me up at the mounting block: NO phase immediate consequence of an APPROPRIATE phase 4 she cares about--if I don't get the result--next time a bigger phase 4 if need be.

When Try sees I am different in my awareness she will drop the sneaky sabotage behavior. I need to be consistent. AND this is FUN--JIM CARREY.

More pressure, persistence and time. Match Energy when she gets emotional riding unless its too much for me to ride then round pen.

Dan T June 30

CAN DO attitude. priority busy busy busy, changing myself--I must see a change. Patience vs persistance. POWER UP

Try's commitment to the relationship: I am now the one giving 75 or 90%!

Stick to me over the barrel/avoiding the jump or other dominance/bad attitude: Play the catch me game when she has the bad attitude or is sneaky about avoiding tasks or only partially does tasks. Change her from side to side until she turns toward me then draw her by walking forward with power up attitude on my part. After she draws, go back to the original task. Repeat as needed.

Falling leaf and the definition of allow at neutral
Carrots for right side lateral flexibility
Improved muscling on crest.

1. Point to point --try stopping 10' in front of the fence--??claustrophobic in zone 1??
2. I have earned the right to use spurs
3. Push my comfort zone on canter speed
4. Canter: Pounding on the front end develops the wrong muscles and isn't good for Try
5. Riding biomechanics: lots of shoulder swing/weave, rib cage, HQ isolations and transitions.
6. Sideways on the rail at a trot
7. Wheelbarrow into canter simple lead changes: 2 leg start and what happened to direct rein start?
8. Gates - in and out of open gates for relaxation, sweet spot and backup. Also applies to opening and closing gates.
9. Check saddle fit - shims pocket shape below the triangle, camping fabric walmart?

Notes from May 23 phone coaching

May22 phone call

1.       I told Dan about Try showing a gorgeous trot at liberty: powering up, tracking up, neck—rhythm, relaxation and contact with me—motivated I think by seeing Forrest more than by anything I did. Actually I saw this at Wendy Batten’s also. Alive, powerful—Wendy said “Breyer” horse look. Dan said he has seen his horse AJ like this—looking like a dressage horse and he’s just a little QH. That Try has shown me she CAN do it—now in the future will be my learning how to get her to do it on purpose. Issue is Try knowing how to carry herself (and me carry myself?). Adrenalin isn’t always bad.

2.       Try on the line between LBI and RBI. When she is sweet, open and responsive—horsenality just a tool to use for me to adjust/flex/experiment. If I wait on Try, checking her out for either RBI feeling pressured or LBI dominance. Sounds like Try has moved onto positive chart.

3.       Lots of improvements for Try—have worked on programs for RBE stuff or things that make Try emotional—still an issue is the girth.

a.       I asked about making a program of distracting her or interrupting the pattern i.e. saddling out in the field with grass or giving her a bucket of grain. OR
b.      Treating this an LB long term habit: copping an attitude—knock it off. Rather than smack her I am saying HEY DON’T DO THAT by moving her feet—interrupting her pattern with my leadership—some short and sweet game (?sideways) and may be helpful to do this with the bareback pad. Make a program of this.
c.       Shouldn’t take long to get results if this is LB behavior.

4.       The big issue for this call: help in changing myself from busy, busy, busy to powerful and effective.

a.       It’s about time: my ability to take that time it takes.
b.      Videotape to prove to myself: that everything goes better between Try and I when I am effective rather than wimpy.
c.       Plan carefully the game—what my phase 1 and 4 will be—visualize myself following the plan. Then video and see how I did.
d.      Effective is doing less. Some situations busy can be better i.e. RBI horse. LB horse like Try needs me to be effective/non-wimpy leader. Powerful phasing. Then put it to purpose.
e.      Helps to play with lots of different horses.
f.        Only play with one horse—get a different horsenality and fall apart. i.e. Nickers—solution there to get Sara to coach me on what to do.
g.       For L4 good to take at least two more horses through L3—different horsenalities than Try.
h.      LBE in your face horse—if I get pissed and whack em so what.
i.         For me fear is an issue with a horse who moves feet. Need plan or assistance i.e Marianne Bennett—playing with Skip.
j.        Check out the way a horse plays naturally: compare Try’s play with Suduko!

5.       Me—having the power and conditioning to be the athlete Try needs—to be able to mirror what I would like to see in Try as to powering up.

a.       Remember my huge E from watching the colt start, from ballet.
b.      Remembering Try’s trot/at Wendy’s.
c.       How much athleticism does it take?
d.      Me back to the gym: consider not just aerobics etc but exercise to increase power i.e. weight lifting. Attitude what creates than sense of power. Dan says don’t worry I will still retain the necessary refinement.
e.      Imagine Try in her power trot and how I can mirror that with my body. Experiment. FUN HOMEWORK for me.

6.       Specific tasks and cueing
a.       Pedestal
             i.      Go ahead and ask her phase 1 to come forward
             ii.      Then go to a phase 4—experiment w/ creative phase4 that matters
           iii.      She needs to hunt for the answer—the good deal
b.      Yoyo
            i.      Yes don’t deliberately bring forth RBI escape.
            ii.      Instead put to purpose by progressing the game
     Faster  Obstacles  Weave
         iii.      Then be watching for rb and be ready to bring life back up and keep going til she figures it out.
           iv.      Taking her to the edge of confidence and expanding her confidence box
c.       Sideways
              i.      Not trying—need to get her back in the game.
               ii.      Phase 1 to 4
            iii.      Purpose: be creative?? Distance, faster, pattern, obstacles
d.      Circling game
         i.      Clear purpose: i.e. shape, attitude, distance after getting rhythm, relaxation and contact put it to purpose
          ii.      If she is maintaining gait then use it to advance transitions or change of direction or distance on the circle etc.
          iii.      Use it to achieve relaxed jumping: small jumps, vary. She needs to be good at jumping with herself so this is better accomplished from circling than a squeeze. Repetition and flow to help her relax and then use just the energy she needs for the jump.
e.      Carrot stick riding
              i.      Walk to halt or trot to halt – bad attitude
1.       Purpose, creativity
2.       Trot to fence and ask for stop ?3-4 feet in advance my life down THINK BAKCUP then phase 2 is 2 sticks
3.       Using the sticks to keep her straight not turning.
4.       Or do it to a jump focusing over the jump
5.       Commi8tment timing, add sticks as tools and part of the game not as the game itself
6.       Feel her Energy come to a stop and shift her weight back especially if I put energy going into it and then quit going forward
7.       Progress canter to a jump, life down, backup—checking into the game
f.        Backing from HQ yields
                i.      Life up, hunker down, me shift back and forth—porcupine not driving
              ii.      Can speed it up later
                iii.      Riding fr4om the HQ not backing from driving the shoulders
         iv.      My level of urgency is what will make this progress