1. resistance/controlling
behaviors whether sneaky introverted or extraverted and obvious. Figure 8 and catch me.
Problem getting
stuck in the corners. Dan says when Try stops, if it is dominance i.e.
making me move first so she wins. then when she stops I could be direct line
and go in and say no by God you'll go--but creates more bad attitude. Try deal
with it and get over it.
OR if she
stops, I can just stand there like a statue, life up not moving open door for
her to move forward and just wait. (martial arts masters--stood for 30 min not
moving and contest declared a draw) Whoever moves first loses. Doing nothing is
the most powerful thing you can do. Be prepared to wait it out as Try can be
very persistent! Signs of a change: blow, lick, sigh, shake, relaxation in the
body and the ultimate is that she will decide to move forward. Experiment
and see if she can turn loose and relax and how she does it.
2. Dan says
if I can be consistent real changes will be made--I need to believe this--she
will learn to see this as a win-win.
All horses
share a basic belief system or instinct that they are always looking for who is
the best leader. The best leader can best fill needs of safety, comfort, play
and food. Horses will follow the best leader in the herd even if nasty and
mean. I shared Try remaining independent of the her with a nasty leader and
really enjoying a benevolent leader. Casper remaining independent for example.
Try has enough sense of self security so as not to be needy and unconfident and
able to be independent.
Starting
Parelli 7 games can change position in the herd:
1. Horses in
the bottom of the pecking order move up because they gain confidence
2. Dominant
horses move down because they gain confidence--desire to dominate based partly
on fear rather than confidence.
Anyway I
said that I feel I am fixing stuff and not moving ahead but that it feels right
to do so. Dan says I am playing with foundation stuff i.e. my goal is playing L1/2 from a
L4 quality rather than playing L4 with an L2 quality.
This requires identifying and changing habits
and history over a span of 7 years. Dan says the positive part of the 7 years
is that I have a lot of relationship with her. The negative is that habits have
been formed that aren't all positive i.e. habits that allow her to win and that
they are unconscious.
Dan says he
appreciated me staying with the catch me session last time until there was a
huge shift Long going through it physically and a challenge to core beliefs and
the feel of a positive new form of leadership. My challenge to myself is--now
am I really doing enough or have I wimped out some?
August: Channeling Rhett--nurturing RBI, soft gentle energy,
zone 1 with Zero tolerance. So I am making a big shift from RBI to power up
LBE. Dan: this is good to do--Me: lots to learn here. Soft, sloooow. This is
good as Try relates so well to RBI's who are good leaders.